i didn't make a title for this. what?

There have been some changes for me this year. I only work in a retail store about once a week. The rest of the time-I have no idea what it is I do. Technically, I am the boss lady's assistant. Not assistant to design. I don't do that. Assistant to what?

I order supplies. Like ink for our printers. I order other things when we're out. I had to take a deep breath when I put in a reorder for some shoes. It was almost $4000! I wrote up an order for next fall gloves and shit for over $30,000!! Geez. I know that's small potatoes or whatever compared to the big boys out in the retail world. Imagine the order Best Buy makes from Apple. Must be insane.

What else do I do? Deal with vendors for returns. This one lady, Mary, is remotely working down in Florida and has failed to get the order right over three times. Must be a hard life, Mary. Now she is not responding to me at all. Grr. You shall feel the wrath of Adarae, Mary, you shall.

Um, I write checks. It is just all so weird. I'm used to seeing results to my efforts. I'm used to knowing how to keep myself busy. When I'm behind a desk with nothing to do-it's fucking boring.

The one perk so far, getting a style of bag I have wanted for a long time-at cost!

The inspiration of said bag:

That's right. A leather bodega bag. But for over $200? No thank you. I'll just continue to use the plastic ones to pick up my dog's poop.

From the company that makes the most light weight amazing wedge on the planet comes this bag:

The most light weight amazing wedge on the planet is so affordable at $100. This is $500?? I guess it must be real croc.

But the bag I ended up getting at cost:

A leather Baggu bag! Did you know that their headquarters were right in Williamsburg? On Wythe Avenue? Neither did I until I put in this order. Crazy town. No seriously. Williamsburg is full of crazies. That wonder the streets without any awareness of anything around them. But that's a whole other story. Kinda like the Halloween or Williamsburg tumblr. Just crazy.

self inflicted pressure

So, I took a week off. What of it?

I just started coat check and it's taking it's toll. My Saturday is now over 20 hours long. On my feet. Forgive me. Please.

It comes down to having so little time to be inspired. How do bloggers do it? Work full time and write shit. Although, I do get disappointed with bloggers that just post a picture and say tadaa! Like all those many tumblrs out there. I'm not impressed with you trolling someone else's tumblr and them re-posting. Ok?

Wow. Who's got cranky pants?

Well, while at work yesterday, I discovered Bruce Davidson. I can't really recall what I was googling. Oh, something about Brooklyn kids and fashion (stay tuned for next post).

Came across this and thought the dude on the right could totally be Ely James:

account this

I like numbers. I like to count them. In an annoying OCD fashion, sometimes. Especially when I am walking down stairs or on the subway platform. I'm not crazy OCD. If I miss a number I don't have to go back to the top of the stairs and start all over or anything.

When I was young, around 8 or 9 years old and my sister had an orchestra concert, I would multiply numbers on the program. I would pick a number and multiply it against itself and then multiple the answer by itself. Until I filled the entire program.

Now that I am at a crossroad of sorts in my life, I have started to think outside the box. Why did it take me so long to start thinking about the future? I have no idea. I just never cared before, I guess. My newest whimsy-if my dream of a rich benefactor coming into my life, handing me $30,000 and saying "go get 'em kid," doesn't come true-is to go back to school. For accounting.

That takes years, you say? Damnit. Why didn't I care earlier? Why?

trafficking

Now that I am losing the best job that I have ever had, due to poor money management on the owner's part (and many other factors actually), I fear for my future. I don't want to go back to corporate retail. Although, that seems to be where the benefits are.

The local store seems to be doomed.

 Everyone wants to save money. I get that. I also understand buying what you need and a quality that will last.

My true dilemma is that my moral compass has been altered. I can't support over consumption. I can't support China. As I get older I revel in the thought of living off the land and bartering with neighbors. So, there is this:  

 Have not tried it yet but it is totally what I'm talking about. Now about that job...